Throughout the year we do all sorts of work to become, or rather uncover, better versions of ourselves — we go to yoga class, we practice mindfulness, we remember to pause and breathe throughout the day, we do our best to meditate a few minutes a day — stuff like this.
And then at the end of the year comes the holiday season where we find ourselves in these highly charged, pressure-cooker-like social situations with family and friends. Before we know it we get triggered, and seemingly all the work we’ve done, all the “progress” we’ve made, all the tools we’ve collected and lessons we’ve learned fly right out the window. In a flash we revert to old habits, old ways of thinking and behaving. Then on January 1st we come out the other end of the season and look around wondering what the hell just happened! Are you kidding me?! I’m here, in this place, again?! Working on this part of myself again?! I thought I “fixed” that part of myself…
“We think the point is to pass the test or overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don’t really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. It’s just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy.” — Pema Chödrön, When Things Fall Apart
We ought to release this idea of “fixing” ourselves. We’re not broken; we don’t need fixing. And yoga will certainly not “fix” anything or any part of anyone. What it can do is help us grow our container to be able to hold it all — the fullness of the human experience. And it can help us tap into our bottomless well of courage so that we might see clearly and be able to sit with all parts of ourselves — the light and dark, the comfortable and uncomfortable, the soft and hard.
“This is a work in progress, a process of uncovering our natural openness, uncovering our natural intelligence and warmth… we already have what we need. The wisdom, the strength, the confidence, the awakened-heart and mind are always accessible, here, now, always. We are just uncovering them. We are rediscovering them. We’re not inventing them or importing them from somewhere else. They’re here.” — Pema Chödrön, Taking the Leap
You can begin right here and now with your breath. During this busy and stressful season I like to practice nadi shodhana pranayama, also known as alternate nostril breathing, to help balance energies and bring me into the present moment. Begin by closing your eyes and placing your attention on your breath. Notice it just exactly as it is without needing to alter or “fix” it. (You can click the link above for a video demonstration of nadi shodhana pranayama. I like to place my index and middle fingers on the forehead at my third eye.)
When you do your asana practice and feel in your body any tightness, tension, resistance, or fear, direct your breath right to that spot, not with the intention of “fixing” it, but rather opening space around it.
Happy holidays! Remember to breathe…
Krystal Barschig 